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Chimpanzees’ Bums, Exploding Patients And A Report On Reports About Reports..

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Trashy Topics That Won At IG Nobel

For a disrupting voice
Japanese duo Kazutaka Kurihara and Koji Tsukada got awarded for inventing a device that can disrupt a person’s speech by deferring their own voice. It’s called the SpeechJammer

How can chimpanzees identify each other
For letting the world know that chimpanzees can identify each other by looking at the pictures of their bums, Frans de Waal of Netherlands and Jennifer Pokorny of the US grabbed an award..

Why hair turns green
Johan Pettersson of Sweden walked up to the stage for explaining why the hair of some people who live in certain areas of Sweden turned green.

For explaining liquid sloshing
Rouslan Krechetnikov and Hans Mayer of the US got the honours for explaining why liquid spills out of containers when the one who is holding it is walking.

For presenting a report on reports
The US Government General Accountability Office was rewarded for issuing a report about reports about reports that recommends the preparation of a report about the report about reports about reports. (Let us know if you can decipher any of that).

To avoid exploding patients
French men Emmanuel Ben-Soussan and Michel Antonietti won the spoof awards for sharing tips with colonoscopies doctors to reduce the chances of explosion in patients during the procedure.

Brain activity in dead salmon
Americans Craig Bennett, Abigail Baird, Michael Miller and George Wolford won an award for telling the brain statisticians that brain activities can even be spotted in a dead salmon using devices and stats.

Can firearms be converted into diamonds
Yes, Russian firm SKN Company won it for doing just that.

How ponytails move
Joseph Keller, Raymond Goldstein, Patrick Warren [UK] and Robin Ball pointed out the movement of the hair in a ponytail.

Crap They Buy

For finding the total surface area in, yes in Indian elephants, Mathematics, 2002:
Two scientists from the Kerala Agricultural University, KP Sreekumar and G Nirmalan published a report titled Estimation of the Total Surface Area in Indian Elephants. Sadly, Nirmalan passed away before receiving his prize.

For renting out the entire nation, Economics, 2003:
Pioneering businessman Karl Shwarzler shared this particular award with the nation of Lichtenstein for making it possible to rent out the nation (yup, the entire nation) for corporate conventions, weddings, bar mitzvahs, and other gatherings.

For inventing an alarm clock that runs away, Economics, 2005:
Gauri Nanda of MIT came up with an alarm clock, which gets up, runs away and hides when it goes off. This, of course, forces the unfortunate resident of the room to get up and search for the dratted clock, thus waking them up in the process, and adding many hours to the working day which may have been spent snoozing.

For finding out if one should eat food that has been on the floor for less than 5 seconds, Public Health, 2004:
Jillian Clarke became an IgNobel laureate in 2004 for investigating the scientific validity of the 5-second rule, i.e., whether or not it’s really safe to eat food, which has been on the floor for less than five seconds.

For inventing gay bombs, Peace, 2007:
We’ve all wrested with the paradoxes of war and peace at times. Well, in 2007 the Air Force Wright Laboratory, Dayton, Ohio came up with the ultimate solution to these problems. They invented the brashly titled “gay-bomb”. It is meant to make enemy soldiers sexually irresistible to each other, bringing peace and love (and by the sounds of it, uncontrollable lust) to the battlefield.

For telling us that long words don’t make a Shakespeare, Literature, 2006:
Princeton academic Daniel Oppenheimer in Applied Cognitive Psychology published – Consequences of Erudite Vernacular Utilized Irrespective of Necessity: Problems with Using Long Words Needlessly. See, it doesn’t make you sound clever. Daniel Oppenheimer said so.

For relating cow’s name to the quantity of milk it produces, Veterinary Medicine, 2009:
Catherine Douglas and Peter Rowlinson investigated a problem that has been bugging farmers for centuries. They managed to ascertain that cows that are given names produce more milk than those who do not. Seriously, your darling Clover will indeed give you more produce than a miscellaneous Jersey.

For establishing blowjobs in fruit bats, Biology, 2010:
A collaborative effort between seven Chinese, and one British scientist successfully documented occurrences of fellatio in fruit bats.

For solving the problem of parking, Peace, 2011:
The mayor of Lithuania’s capital Vilnius, Arturus Zuokas, demonstrated that the problem of illegally parked luxury cars can be solved by running them over with an armoured tank.

- Kumar Saurav

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yay or Nay!
  

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