UNDO HER BRA WITH ONE HAND

Admit you have a problem (but not a terminal one).
If you’re facing a woman’s back and still can’t do it – you don’t need FHM, you need an optician.
True we all secretly wonder why all bras aren’t like string bikinis – just tug on a string and that’s it. Stop dreaming.
Pinch one clasp lip between the thumb and index finger, hold the other strap between the 3rd and the 4th finger. One hand still playing with whatever of hers its playing with, with the other push both hands close together as if you’re tightening it (yah as if!), twist a bit. And shazam.
There’s the fold approach – fold the hook and the eye clasp together (facing each other) open end of the hooks have now rotated 180 degrees, facing the other way and the elastic will pull the band apart. Ahh the sweet sweet snap.
There’s another semi pro trick – pull the hook end to the right with your forefinger and push the bottom end to the left simultaneously. Once the hooks are free of their captors – the bra is ready to be tossed onto a night stand.
There’s the sly approach – slip one strap off her shoulder, then slip the other one off.Nuzzle you know where and then slowly edge it off with teeth or nose.Very result oriented.
You hate sports bras – we all do; they’re the worst invention since the Bluetooth headsets. But they don’t have a clasp they and strapless bras are our friends. Tug hard.
Now, for the bad news – our knowledge about women’s bras is very 20th century – when all bras had regular clasps. Front clasp bras are a man’s arched nemesis. These are pure evil. EVIL. Women love them. But remember these are bras we haven’t trained on or about. It sounds easy when you think about it – but once you come face to face with one – that’s it! Thankfully not all women wear them; unfortunately some of the really hot ones do. So all we can tell you is – remember – they will not snap open as such... but have a hook each side is hooked into...they are normally unhooked by pulling one upwards and inwards (which is good anything that gets you closer is) and the other downwards.
If she’s wearing a cross back bra – she is insensitive, thoughtless, unsure of herself and trying to ward off attention from her body. Use a pair of scissors this one time, have sex with her.Later in bed, make a joke and try and figure out its workings. Can’t understand? Try and get her off them. Try using the scissors approach, she’ll soon run out of them. If she doesn’t, find a girl whose breasts are not bound by four or five pairs of clasps. She might as well weld them shut.
But whatever you do remember. Women are man traps. No matter how many times she screams your name – remember these things are going into the permanent book to be drawn out later and ass can and will be taken at a future date. If you’re too good at it, she’ll smile then but you’ll later be branded a man-whore for all practical purposes. You fumble, then you’re just a fumbling fool who fumbled so much with her bra, she had to unhook it - herself.
Rue you weren’t born in the 60s – when all bras were burning in a heap. Pat Pat Pat. There There There.