Rip Super Skinny Jeans
Hugging your legs since decades, super skinny jeans are no more. We investigate why.
It wasn’t just a legendary punk drummer that died when Tommy Ramone passed away in July. The last original member of The Ramones is credited as the man who took the rock heroes from glam leather to their trademark, testicle-suffocating denim ‘look’, and, in turn, brought drainpipes to the masses with his 1976 anthem Blitzkrieg Bop. Since then they’ve been in and out of fashion, but in some macabre coincidence, it looks like the gonads of Great Britain can breathe a collective sigh of relief once again as denim is getting baggy. Well, baggier.
“It’s all about the Levi 511,” predict our fashion experts. “Skinny jeans aren’t about to vanish but they are retreating back to their natural habitat of rock clubs with sticky floors. The mainstream is embracing a roomier fit.”
That’s all good news, not just for men who never really got the skinny look, but also for the future of the nation if a report ina local daily to be believed – and we do believe everything we read in the paper reported that ‘trendy tight denim are causing twisted testicles, bladder weakness, urinary tract infections and even lower sperm counts amongst men’.
So, literally for the sake of your children, make your next pair of denims roomier around your nether regions.
A big factor in the quality of a pair of skinny jeans will be the durability of them. With jeans, it is slightly different to other pairs of trousers and other garments like t-shirts. Whereas you may wear a t-shirt once or twice a week, you’ll probably wear jeans at least four or five times a week.
At the end of the day you want your jeans to last you a good few outings and retain their shape well. Once a pair of jeans start to become loose and lose the ‘skinny’ fitting, then you’ll want to get yourself a new pair.